Insignificant
by Red Ink Madame
Summary: No matter how many times she tried to tell herself otherwise, Jenny was barely keeping her head above water.


**Title:** Insignificant

**Author:** gossipgirrlxoxo

**Characters/Pairing:**Jenny Shepard and Jethro Gibbs (Jibbs)

**Genre:** Angst

**Rating: **T

**Word Count:** 473

**Summary: **Going to Paris had been one of the best ideas she'd had in a long time. Getting drunk in Paris. Not so much.

**Warnings/Spoilers: **Set during early season four, shortly after Gibbs' return from Mexico.

**Notes: **Written for LJ's madame_director – Memories That Remain challenge and inspired by two prompts _{__**Scenary**__ & __**Insignificant**__} _& a quote _{__**"There are mornings I'm just nodding my head, and that can't be good for anybody." (The West Wing)**__}_ given to me by nici's anatomy. So please read & review. Feedback esp. honest feedback is always appreciated. For my all other stories, check out my LJ - .com/

**Disclaimer: **Oh believe me if I owned NCIS and it's characters. Leon Vance would never have become director. Kate would still be working along side Tony and I would have found another way to bring Ziva in. Also Jenny would still be director and would not be six feet under. Jethro and Jenny would be together and just to make Abby happy there would be Gibblets. But since Kate and Jenny are dead and Vance is now the director. It's clear who owns NCIS. Not me. Enough said.

* * *

No matter how many times she tried to tell herself otherwise, Jenny was barely keeping her head above water. These days it seemed like she was fighting a rising tide. Nothing she did was ever good enough. Everything she'd said was constantly ignored. She felt **insignificant**. Who she was and what she did, just simply did not seem to matter anymore.

Some days she wished for a change of **scenery**. A new life. One completely different from the life she had now. She didn't like what her life had become. She wasn't even sure she liked who she'd become. She couldn't look herself in the mirror. She'd even come to hate the sound of her own voice. Her words sounding so incredibly shallow to her.

And though she would never admit it, the career she'd always wanted had consumed her.

**"There are mornings I'm just nodding my head, and that can't be good for anybody."**

Her voice, a soft whisper, lace with bitterness and the emptiness she felt. She'd sensed his presence the moment she'd stepped into the semi – dark refuge of her office. Though she'd refused to acknowledge him immediately. Not until she'd poured herself a large measure of bourbon and was safely behind her desk. Knowing that this would put enough distance between him and her.

"You've been drinking a lot lately Jen."

Jethro emerged from the shadows. Concern written allover his face.

"Been spying on me Jethro?"

Though her eyebrows rose and her lips curled into a slight smirk. Jenny's eyes remained emotionless.

"Dammit Jen. Don't play games with me."

His anger surprised her, just as much seeing him slam his hands down on her desk.

"Wasn't aware that I was Jethro. Besides I'm not the one who ran away to Mexico for some little margarita safari."

Her words harsh. Her tone cold.

"Yeah, but I am not the Director of NCIS Jen."

"A little hypocritical don't you think Jethro? I mean this coming from NCIS' most senior special agent, who abandoned his team..."

"I didn't abandon them Jen."

Jethro's words filled anger as he lent forward. His eyes offering her a silent challenge.

"Oh please, don't give me that bullshit Jethro. You walked out on them when they needed you the most."

Jenny rose from her chair as she rested both hands on her desk. Her eyes answering his challenge.

"What's this about Jen?"

His voice barely above a whisper. His anger gone. As she almost recoiled at the raw emotions she saw in his eyes, the phone on her desk sprung to life. Cynthia's soft and hesitant voice quickly filled the room as Jenny was reminded of her required presence in MTAC. Grabbing the files from her desk, she slipped past him as he watched her walk out door.


End file.
